...and wanting to jump off of it. Usually my days go by fast and I would be cheery, listening to music and even with out music I would still be hearing it. Now all I hear is silence. Everything stands still for me and I'm not wanting to be here. My eyes are back to that teary-strained feeling once again, when for the past 9 months I was smiling and only tearing because of happiness. Why does it get taken away like that...story of my life. God, I miss her so much.
I know that I hadn't met my girl exactly in person, but we had such a strong connection. I hadn't touched her physically, but I wanted to feel her so much. This is how pathetic I was looking for signs that I'd hear from Lila again. Her dad owns a Lexus and before I used to see a bunch of Lexus cars driving around and today I had to look for them. I was saying inside my mind that if I see a Lexus from my work until I reach home, there is a fighting chance that I'd have Lila back again. Today I didn't see one Lexus and I was becoming sad, not until I reached my house there were 2 Lexus' that were driving one behind the other and my eyes lit up. I know wishful thinking right? I don't want to do anything right now, so I guess I'm going to sleep and hope for some kind of miracle to happen again. ='[
I know that I hadn't met my girl exactly in person, but we had such a strong connection. I hadn't touched her physically, but I wanted to feel her so much. This is how pathetic I was looking for signs that I'd hear from Lila again. Her dad owns a Lexus and before I used to see a bunch of Lexus cars driving around and today I had to look for them. I was saying inside my mind that if I see a Lexus from my work until I reach home, there is a fighting chance that I'd have Lila back again. Today I didn't see one Lexus and I was becoming sad, not until I reached my house there were 2 Lexus' that were driving one behind the other and my eyes lit up. I know wishful thinking right? I don't want to do anything right now, so I guess I'm going to sleep and hope for some kind of miracle to happen again. ='[
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